Adventures in Niflalfheimr

Day 2
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We wake up in day 2 of the time loop.

Lily goes straight for her house.

Raskogg tries to remember if he knows anything about the crazy monster that killed us.

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Free Drinks and The Morning After
some rip van winkle shit

We arrive at the Bargewright Inn; Shalvis skedaddles real fast but tells us to talk to a lady inside. Zira, a half elf with rusty red hair, offers us a night in the Inn and drinks on the house, as well as a favor, which we decide to keep in our pocket (but not before Lily finds out that deep gnomes are responsible for making Bowie’s pants)

We sleep.


The inn stocks us up with supplies because they’re super cool yay!

We start back to Corlan, but remember to ask first: How do we get in touch with the Lord’s Vassals to call in our favor? We’re told to look for the mark of the king (a lightning bolt) on their left middle finger.


We wave as we pass by Goldenfields.

A couple days later we arrive at Staghorned Flagon. We find Arliosa Starhenge (an old carnival friend of Miros Xelbrin) and give her his regards.

She asks how he is, and we chat for a while.

Lily, unsubtly, checks out her hands to see if she’s wearing any rings, and notices a wooden ring covered with figures of carved nymphs. Arliosa notices, and takes it off and tells a story about the adventurer who gave it to her. She says, “When the adventurer gave me this ring he said, if you ever in need of your own adventure, take the ring off and whisper into it the name ‘Keltar Dardragon’”. She looks at the ring for a short while. “Honestly it never appealed to me, here: you have it” She hands it to Lily, who immediately puts it on.
We talk some more

Braith makes five silver from playing songs, and then tips the bartender.


On the last night on the road we find a campsite and have a big blowout of all our leftovers. Braith sings some songs, Fengarr catches some fish and we cook them. Lily tries to fight Raskogg, and doesn’t manage to engage him but lands a couple punches before he picks her up and holds her in the air for while. Raskogg continues trying to teach the horses to gamble with dice (and continues to be unsuccessful, but at least the horses don’t mind when he cheats) Nittia has a conversation with some birds and mice, a couple of them bring her one nut each. A bird brings a shiny rock.


The next morning we all wake up, alone (individually), in a forest. We all see the same clearing: there’s a stream, some birds singing, but something is very wrong.


Karina realizes she is now has super red skin, large horns, and a really long tail. She freaks out, confronted by her greatest fear, and drops to her knees in frantic prayer.


Fenngar wakes up, similarly, and immediately notices that he has a really long beard. His hands are an old man’s hands. He is an old man.
He notices that is exactly noon. The river is in the wrong place. He has no idea how he ended up here. Fenngar heads south, where there’s a path


Lily wakes up similarly. You say outloud, to Bale: “What happened?” And no one answers. Bale is not there.
Lily fires a Ki blast straight into the air to see if she can. She can, it goes off perfectly. She surveys the clearing, and finds a tall tree to climb. She sees 6 identical clearings: one for each of us (but doesn’t recognize Karina and Fengarr and also Sidilic, wandering confused in the woods.


Braith wakes up, and notices immediately that all his little furry friends are gone. This isn’t by itself unusual, so he dumps a pile of seeds on the ground and shouts to see if anyone can hear him: Lily does


Nittia wakes up and doesn’t notice anything amiss. Confused how she got here, she picks up a rock nearby and asks it what happened. It doesn’t respond, her powers are gone.


Raskogg wakes up and checks his gold, as he does every morning: it’s missing. The bag of holding that all of our stuff. He detects magic: It is all magic. Everything is magic, and it’s all kinds of magic at once. He frowns, takes out his sword and goes off in a random direction.


BRAITH SHOUTS
Lily replies: “Hey Braith I hear you! Keep shouting I’ll bring the other ones to you!” She hops off in the trees, yells to Fengarr to go to Braith, and drops in on Karina “Hey Lady, if you’re lost there’s a bunch of us grouping up over — oh. oh my” she realizes that it’s Karina. “Hey. I uh, I like it” Karina snaps at her, and refuses to go. Lily jumps off, and doesn’t tell the others what she saw.
Fengarr happens on Nittia, who comments on how old he looks. “My bones are hurting, there’s a storm coming”

Lily recounts the other things that she saw from the treetops: A clock tower (not unheard of, but really unusal) and the top of a house.

They also run into Sidilic, who is preppy as usual “Hey Guys!”


We have to end here: Next time we have to convince Karina to join us and also figure out what the heck is going on.

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On the way to Bargewright Inn
Bonobo!

Braith refills his backpack with seeds for 5 silver.

Shalvis Maltholio exclaims, “Bonobo!” and then we head off in our cart.

As soon as we exit the gate all of Braith’s mice friends come back and it’s adorable and not weird at all. (It’s super weird, bonobo)

We have a ton of quick mini-adventures that we remember fondly.

After the first night, early in the morning, Fengarr feels what seems like a really minor earthquake, or maybe indigestion.
Fengarr realizes there’s a giant nearby, just off to the north from us (across the river).
He tells the party.
Shalvis says, “What do you mean, bonobo?”
He means that there is a giant.
We send Lily to run and check it out, since she’s fast and we need to tire her out anyway because this trip is WAY more peaceful when she’s napping.

Lily runs out after the giant, she runs about 250 feet before she hears a hill giant voice similar to but distinct from Lob and Ogg.
She climbs a tree, flipping up into it’s canopy and finding a hidden spot to peer out – and sees (about 100 feet away) a hill giant stand up and looks right at her. She waves; he waves back and shouts something quizzical. Lily mimes an eating notition. He squints and tilts his head, and starts walking towards her. When he reaches her, he holds out his hand. Lily thinks about it, sees a handful of ogres and goblins behind him, then sets his beard on fire.
She misses, and boops him on the nose. He swats at his face and ROARS.

Lily runs.

From the wagon, we hear a giant roaring, and look at each other. That’s not promising. We prepare for a fight.
Shalvis says to Lily, seeing her stop running and dig in for a fight, “What are you doing, bonobo? Keep Running!”

We fight the giant for a while, and then he runs away, and Lily sets his beard on fire.
He turns to plunge his head into the river, locks eyes with Nietta – and drops dead. Nietta smirks.

Everything runs away.

We bury the giant, and some of it’s dead bugbear and ogre friends who didn’t manage to run fast enough. Giant has a big pouch full of scavenged food- some mushrooms, half a sheep. Also a large iron bell and a wooden toboggan.

Later that night we make it to the Bargewright Inn, Shalvis is very grateful he says, “Thank you very much, Bonobo” and directs us to some other goblin king servants to talk to, maybe one of them has a reward. Bonobo. Nietta plants a tracker on him. He doesn’t go very far he just goes into the Inn.

Braith goes and plants some seeds outside.

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In Which We Get Too Many Quests

We’re talking to some giants

“Why does Guh need food?”
“Guh want be biggER”

we learn:
Both the giants are Guh’s husbands; Ammon (The all-father, giant god) went away (it’s not clear where), Ammon might be mad;

We get the giants to promise not to come back and then let then them go, but first we exchange for them a mirror (courtesy Naxine, the caster lady) that Nitta has cast a tracker on.
--
We open the smelly sacks. We find:

A mangy fur pelt
a ten foot long hempen rope tied to a rowboat anchor (Lily immediate ties this to her back)
a 50 foot hemp rope
a small wooden box full of exquisitely crafted turquoise animal figurines (w. 250g)
a large, well-made tapestry (w. 250g)

a giant-sized bone comb
a 5-foot length of chain
a small idol made of gold – in the shape of Ammon (w. 750 g)
a normal sized “potion of acid resistance” (gives acid resistance 1 hr.)
--

We learn from Naxine that
a) there’s been more giant sightings that she didn’t believe
b) she asks us to tell a friend of hers in Corlan (a dragon expert) named Chazlauth Yarghorn who she wants us to tell about this and ask for help. She also tells us where he lives (in a tall stone house with a tower) She thinks that he could get some good dragons to help us

Xi Liang also steps forward, hearing that we’re headed back to Corlan.
She thanks us for helping (and believing me – side eyes Naxine) and then pulls out a necklace from under her shirt – it has a black pearl pendant. She hands it to Karina, and asks us to visit house Thann. (and presumably give him that)
Lily remembers playing with a boy named Colin from House Thann. Colin was a dick.

We decide that we’re gonna follow the giants. While we’re packing up, Orin hands Braith a letter and asks him to take it to his sister Lily in Daggerford who works at the Happy Cow Tavern. Braith agrees.

After we are packed up and get down into the main tavern room, Miros stops us, and tells us to go the StagHorned Flagon in Amphail (it’s between here and Corlan) and give us his regards to the proprietor Arliosa Starhenge.

On the way out the door we’re stopped by the Shepherd Shalvis. He asks where we’re going and mentions that he was looking for some protection. Then he name drops David Bowie (except never actually says his name) and asks for an escort to the Bargeright Inn.
We tell him that we’ll be back in Goldenfield after we find the Giants and we’ll take him with us from there.

On our way out the door, we run into the big tree, who thanks us for helping save the children.
He says we remind him of a friend he had, Erglas (the elf). Erglas used to fight giants! He left 30 years ago, and went to Shadowtop Cathedral? He was looking for a Treeant named Turlang. He suggests we go looking for those two.


They’re moving erratically and… towards Corlan. We figure that they might be lost, so we go catch up with them and ask them if they’re lost.
They are, but they don’t know it..
We drill them as much as possible to try to get them on the right track towards their home. We learn there are stone ruins by a lake. Or maybe they built stone buildings? With Hobgoblins.
We get frustrated and go back to Goldenfields.

We pick up Shelvis and decide to take him to his place, BargeRight Inn. It’s the farthest away, but /~o~

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Attack on Golden Fields
We are Now Level 6

We fought a pair of giants, Ogg and Lob.

Fengarr saved the day with a really effective terrain spell that had the side effect of creating lots of extra grain (which hopefully makes up for that Karina set a bunch of it on fire)
We all took pot shots for a really long time, the only one able to get close enough to touch them was Lily.

Niatta turned them against each other, and then after Ogg killed Lob (we saved him, don’t worry) she convinced him to surrender.

It turns out they are big dumb babies and respond well to intimidation – Braith puffed up like a tiny squeaky frog (and Lily stood on one’s shoulders and punched him in the neck) while Fengarr convinced them to tell us what was going on. Basically they are serving a bigger giant-bully, Guh, who may or may not be as dumb as they are.

Fengarr convinced them that there isn’t food here, which was difficult when they were literally standing in a wheat field but also not that difficult. They’re REAL dumb.

And now we’re level 6!

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6 MONTHS LATER

What We Have Been Doing

We bought the Tickling Cricket

Fengar: Hanging out, learning Giant, growing herbs in the basement with the help of daylight and druid craft.

Sigrid: Bought an Inn

Karina: Became an Arbiter for the Shield of all Faiths

Raskogg: Worked out a lot, laid around in his pile of gold

Lily: Joined an underground, illegal fighting ring.

Braith: Busked on street corners, gained some notoriety as “That Weird singing Gnome”


Karina goes to talk to Sister Bethanine. Bethanine is like, “We found this lady wandering around trying to convince people she was a God? Can you take care of this?” And Karina is like “Okay!”
Gaspa walks in and immediately confronts Karina about being a secret Tieflling. Bethanine leaves the room; Karina bursts into tears; Gaspa and Karina have a heart to heart. Gaspa gives Karina some reassurance that she’s not evil.


We’re hanging out in the Tickling Cricket and suddenly Fengar notices that there’s a piece of paper in the middle of the table.—

To my Generous Friends,

I am afraid that proper compensation can’t be made on a gift as grand as the one you all were gracious enough to bestow upon me. Let me instead share with you a little secret. The Golden Fields that feed the people of your… charming city have a very big pest problem. Or are about to. They may need some rat catchers.

We give the [[ https://corlan.obsidianportal.com/adventure-log/the-death-of-mr-vastion | backstory]] to Gaspa. She’s a little confused but mostly rolls with it.


GoldenFields is a location


We decide to leave right away, pile into a wagon and sleep on the way.

It takes about a day to get there, the following evening we get to a big wall (60 feet high!) and after some searching and Braith shaking out his mice stowaways we’re let in.
Immediately inside there’s a big statue of Chantilla and a little gift shop stand staffed by a halfling. Niatta probes about pests, the halfling gives free samples (seeds!), and directs her to the Abbey.

There’s a big ‘ol tree with baby children playing on it. It’s got a face. It’s an awakened tree! Lily goes to play on it, but only after some insistence, and Karina pointing out that she’d be way better than the other children.
The tree introduces himself:
“I am Lifferlas, and you are welcome in my boughs.”

We arrive at the abbey. Raskogg drives the cart up to the Inn.

The abbey is the largest, oldest, and most elaborate building in Goldenfields.
We mostly all go into the abbey.
(Lily organizes a child fighting ring)

Suddenly turning a corner we run into two black bears. Startled, Braith throws some seeds at them. They eat them He feeds them more seeds.
Niatta convinces them to take a nap.
(Lily asks the tree about the history of this place. The tree talks for a long time)
When we get to the Abbot’s office – Ellardin Darovik – a half orc walks out and says hi.
We walk into the office, and explain why we’re there. The abbot is very sure they don’t have a pest problem.
A lady, eavesdropping as we walked by, tells us about seeing giants. The abbot dismisses her as basically imagining things but we get a bunch of information about her giant sighting.

The abbot invites us to spend the night, and welcomes our help investigating.
Niatta gets a beer, Karina attends the evening service.

Xi Lian takes Braith up onto the wall, he checks it out. He can’t see anything, but gets an area of where the Giants were sighted. Then he gets down from the wall and finds some birds, and plays them a nice little song and (casts speak with animals) to see if they’ve seen any giants and if they’re willing to fly around and look for them.
One bird mentions he saw really big people to the east, they had funny shadows. Bumpy?
Braith sings them a Lullaby.

Braith shares this information – Fengar thinks really hard, and so does everyone else, but no one has any idea what the bumpy shadows are.

We decide to have dinner and drink beer and decide to investigate in the morning.


Lily flags down the orc we saw earlier, and then “Fight Club” and they fight I guess?


The rest of us make our way to the inn. Theres some lute music, Braith and the lutist face off (Dueling lutes)
The rest are greeted by a really boisterous, hairy man (Miros Xelbrin). Karina lets him know that the abbot etc. She namedrops effectively. He welcomes up, and offers us all our first Golden Gulp free.

The halfing lutest introduces himself – Oren Yogilvi – and he and Braith play some duets. Oren is pretty drunk.

Lily comes in eventually,

Night falls, and we go to sleep.


WE’RE UNDER ATTACK! (because of course we are)

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The Mutiny
Griffons and Diarrhea

We’re in the Barracks. Lily learns some new gambling tricks, she’s actually pretty good at it.

We’ve been told we need to attend initiation at the chapel, which seemed sinister and cult-like

We sneak off to go look for the crates, on a hunch of Sigrid’s. Karina goes up to a not-pirate staff person, and ask them where the crates are going – claiming that she had a box of personal items and thought it might’ve ended up with the other crates. Staff person shows her to the boxes; she doesn’t find anything with the symbol on it. She asks about the symbol. Staff remembers a box with that on it; it was taken upstairs. Karina salutes awkwardly and leaves.

Raskogg goes looking for Sholar’s room, disguised as Sholar. He doesn’t know for sure where his rooms are, but guesses that he stayed in the same place with the other blue people (since Sholar is blue). He goes to the TOWER! (ominous music)
In the tower Raskogg sees blue guy (Reash) and some other scary dudes playing cards. Reash greets him. “SHOLAR! What are you doing here? Wanna play cards?”
“No I just lost a bunch of money at dice”
“Yeah that happens. That’s why we fine them, heh? "
Raskogg goes for a high five. Reash high fives him, and immediately see through the illusion.

WHO ARE YOU WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS? WHO ARE YOU
Raskogg looks sheepish for a second. He weaves a tale: “Sholar sent me. The boss tried to have him killed in Corlan”
Reash buys it, asks more questions Raskogg elaborates. “Sholar thought you’d back him up in his bid for pirate king”
He gets Reash on board. They hash a plan: “Sholar” is going to give a signal, then Sholar and Reash are going to take down the boss (who is a wereboar)
Meanwhile: Raskogg also learns that the box ladyface ( Aerisi Kalinoth) is looking for is in Grimjaw’s secret office.

The mutiny is planned.

Raskogg comes back to the party in our little huddle circle and lets us know this.
We decide we’re gonna try to poison Grimjaw. Karina finds some medical supplies that could induce vomitting and/or diarrhea; we plan to add this to his drink.

[Extended discussion about pooping into a portable hole: The Biff Bag]

[We decide that we’re going to make Fengar turn into a mouse and then put the hat on him and then he’ll disguise himself as a bee so he can fly but a bee wearing a tiny hat. And then someone will see the bee in a hat and try to smash it and when he touches it he realizes it’s not a bee but a flying mouse and then fengarr explodes out of the mouse and then the person faints because what is even real anymore.
It was funny I promise
I guess you had to be there ]

So the plan is: We will hat of disguise as a random commoner and bring him a mug of poison that’s prestidigitated to taste like beer.
During this Fengarr will mouse form into his secret office and get the box.
Then we leave I guess

Sigrid pretends to be drunk and tries to go upstairs, to see what happens.

She runs into a guard, who spins her around and turns her the other direction: in the process she successfully picks his pocket. She gets a pouch. There’s 10 gold in it.

Fengarr turns into a lizard and climbs up the wall, looking for a way into the “secret office”. There aren’t windows but there are arrow slits/murder holes. Lizard-Fengarr,

with the portable hole, climbs up the tower, and into a murder hole.

Inside is just a hallway. Lizard scoots out and looks for another murder hole.
He eventually finds the study. There’s some chests in it; but the box we’re looking for isn’t just sitting out in the open.

Raskogg prestidigitates the poison to taste like beer. Sigrid puts on the hat, goes into the kitchen, grabs a tankard, poisons it and brings it to Grimjaw. She sets it in front of him and takes his other one. He doesn’t notice anything. He just starts drinking.

Fengarr realizes he’s in the secret office. The chests, however, are all locked. Two of them are large and heavy and sound like coins. One is lighter. Fengarr takes the whole chest.

Then he looks at the two remaining chests. He’s not sure which one we need. He looks around back into the bag of holding to see how much room there is. He notices our scroll of polymorph.


Grimjaw doesn’t feel so great. His tummy is rumbling. He looks around. Grunts. Runs upstairs.
--

Fengarr has been spending the last several minutes making a big hole in the stone wall. Everything is ready.
He casts the polymorph spell.

Grimjaw bursts in. Stares.
Grimjaw vomits.

a giant griffon bursts out of the tower, a chest in each of its talons. It flies away, with a scree and a caw.


The whole keep is stunned, staring. They drop their weapons.

Grimjaw burts out of the tower and yells, “Get that Bird!”
Grimjaw vomits again.

Raskogg is wearing the hat of disguise again, disguised as Sholar. “WE’RE TAKING THE BOAT OUT AFTER IT!” He shouts at Grimjaw. Grimjaw nods, vomits. His pants are wet with diarrhea.

We get the boat ready, and depart. Reash lets us out, with a meaningful glance and a nod.

We sail into the sunset, after the griffon.


After almost an hour there’s a large thunk. A large gryphon lands on the boat, and turns back into Fengarr. We count our treasure, it’s a lot (see Treasury). There’s a quick argument about the box – we don’t open it.

We sail back to Corlan, return the box to Aerisi Kalinoth. She’s pleased, gives us a bag of gems worth 2,000 gold.

We buy the tickling Cricket.

THE END

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We're on a Boat
I won't. I Refuse.

We have a map; we take a nap!

Braith kicks the rats off the boat; and Raskogg goes to go find some hammocks.

We start getting ready for departure; to the Pirate Castle. Probably we won’t die.

Long Rest

Time Passes

During the trip, which is uneventful, Fengar teaches Lily how to tie a sailor’s knot.
sailors_knot.jpg
When they begin drawing near to their destination, Karina finds a spyglass in the hold, and spies with it: an area where the cliffs we’ve been following (the coast) slope down to a river outlet. Along the river there are walls.

It’s definitely the pirate castle. There’s a big closed gate.

Karina yells to the group. It occurs to Fengar and Braith that this boat is expected; and we’re not the crew.
Raskogg goes to dress up in Sholar’s clothes, and considers turning himself blue.
Braith and Karina vote for telling them the truth. “Yeah they’re pirates. They’ll probably be fine with it”
Sigrid remembers that Lily has a hat of disguise. She could effectively impersonate captain Sholar, except for her voice which would still sound like a 12 year old girl.
Or we could give someone else the hat.
Raskogg gets the hat.
Braith gets the halflings clothes on. Sigrid decides she’ll spin a tale about how she killed the first mate and is the first mate now.

Lily continues to attempt to impersonate Sholar’s voice, regardless.

The boat moves inexorably forward.

As we get closer, we get a better view of the keep: It’s under construction, right now, being renovated to repair some previous damage.

A guard yells out: “Who goes there?”
Raskogg shouts back: “It is I; Captain Sholar! Let me in.”

The gate starts to raise up. We can see another big boat docked on the wall, and a space on the shore for our boat to be moored.

We decide to dock in the place where it looks like our boat goes.

A couple muscle-y looking men descend from the tower and stand on shore, looking expectant. Fengar looks at them blankly for a second. “OH! ROPES!” He says. He throws them some ropes. Hopefully the right ones.

They pull us up onto the shore. Lily jumps into a barrel and puts the lid on. Karina also gets in a barrel. Braith starts carrying barrels and boxes from the hold to the deck to prepare for unloading. The two shore guys come up the ramp and start hauling stuff.

Four figures come down the stairs from the tower. A couple heavily armed guards with freaky looking shark tooth blades, and bare-chested blue man with a mustache.
Arrested_Development__Meet_Tobias_Funke.jpg

The big blue guy yells out “Sholar! You finally made it!” He looks at Sigrid, quizzically. “Who’s the Lady? Where’s Pike?” Sigrid shouts “I killed him” at the same time Sholar yells “He Shat himself to death after some bad food in Corlan”
Blue guy looks shocked for a second, but buys the story.
“Heck of a way to go.” There’s a moment of silence.
“Well, you guys got this out here? Sholar, the boss will want to see you” Sholar replies in the affirmative.

Everybody else leaves, letting us unload. About every ten minutes the strongmen come back and grab some crates and leave again.

While they’re gone, Raskogg decides he’s going to impersonate another member of the crew, and then we can just be like, “I thought Sholar went to see the boss”

Those of us who are not in barrels pick up those who are in barrels and follow the burly dudes up the stairs with their burdens.

When get to the end we see a staging area, seemingly outside the kitchens. Every couple minutes some commoners pop out and grab the supplies, and take them to their larder or whatever.

Still holding the barrel, Raskogg grabs a commoner that pops out. “Hey, Sholar asked me to take this to his room specifically. Can you show me where it is?” The person looks unimpressed, and points to the keep. " ’s probably in there". “Okay, thanks”

We start walking over there.

We get into the great hall. It’s really fancy, there’s a big shirtless guy looking through papers. He looks up. “Who are you?”
“We’re Sholar’s crew”
“Sholar… I don’t remember any of you”
“Apparently his other crew had some deadly shits.”
This exchange goes on for a while, but somehow the Bossman believes everything eventually, and introduces himself as Grimjaw.
We get pointed to the the barracks and head on our way.

We get out of the great hall, and see a bathhouse. Guessing that the bathhouse will be empty, we take the barrels to the bathhouse. Raskogg and Sigrid go to the Barracks and get shown to the bunks of Sholar’s old crew. They go through their old chests and find a bunch of pirate clothes! Sigrid takes the clothes to Karina and Lily so they can look like pirates, while Raskogg sits down with some sailors and gambles, and collects information.
He find out that Grimjaw is a good boss but there’s something suspicious that happens to him at night.
Also he asks why people are blue and learns that there are sketchy things that happen in the chapel for orientation.

Karina gets her pirate clothes on, basically looking like captain Jack Sparrow; and really pulls off the look.

It’s afternoon, we’ve all been welcomed and no one seems suspicious that we’re here at all. Raskogg goes to the bathhouse and turns back into Sholar, to go make his report to Grimjaw. Sigrid accompanies him.

The rest of us stand loitering by the door in case things go bad.

Instead, it actually goes super well. There’s a gruff exchange of words, Grimjaw by this point is too drunk to really see through the illusion, and then it’s done.

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Babby's First Adventure Log
By Kyle Age 8

All the players want to burn down the docks. The characters may also want to. It is unclear.

ROLL FOR INITIATIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There are 3 or 4 baddies or something. There’s like, a waterman named sholar, and some pirates or something. Braith and Sigrid delay actions! Fenngar whips his vines out in an attempt to entangle the enemy. Lily DBZ energy blasts!

FIGHT!!!!

POW! BLAM! FIZZ! KA-ZOW!

The wetguy pulls a bunch of water outta the bay and KERSPLASH! TIDAL WAVE ATTACK!

OH FUCK THAT HURT

OH FUCK HE KILLED HIS BUDDIES

Karina is on fiiiiiiiiiire. Three rays of fire shoot out at the guy on the thing (waterdude on boat).

Raskog walks away. Or rolls away? Who knows.

raskog-utility-cart-beige__0251742_PE390385_S4.JPG

Braith shoots her hand crossbow at boatwetmen, and misses terribly. Braith rages furiously.

Sigrid tries to murder a child. Or a halfling. Or whatever.

Fenngar heals a child. Lily gets up and BDZs again! BDZ hit! wet willy water man is died. BDZ again! hobbit almost died. Karina makes sure he will never see his loved ones again.

Combat = over. 12 seconds have passed. it was good.

some stupid dumb guard is all like “hey you shouldn’t murder people, is this your ship?” and Raskog says “oh ya for sure, I have my ship papers on the inside of my ship”. And the guard believes him for some reason. Sigrid runs into the boat and steals the paperwork so that we can lie about owning the ship. Sigrid steals the title for the ship, the “Minute Maid”.

Guards dispose of the corpses of the actual owners of the ship. And that is how this group of adventurers committed grand theft nauto.

there were a bunch of crates with symbols. but it wasnt the xmas tree symbol, it was the other one, the pirate x thingy. There was also a map of southwest not-iceland with the location of hidden secret pirate hideaway.

Something about dwarvish calzones. or delzones. or something.

dwarfcalzone.jpg

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Merchants of Vengeance
Adventures of the Tickling Cricket

Sidellac gives a large sigh and trudges off into the city. After a few minutes he gets to a big stone tower in the university district and climbs a bunch of stairs. From his pocket, Fengar hears him knock on the door and a woman’s voice answers.

As he enters the room, he is nervous and deferential. Stammering, he asks the woman – a mist elf woman of indeterminate age – where she wants the journal. She shrugs dismissively and waves. “Just throw it anywhere.” Sidellac does so, and then leaves, giving a large sigh after he leaves.

Fengar jumps out of his pocket and creeps into the lady’s room. The lady is sitting at a desk looking over some papers, looking very serious. The room itself is full of books; with large windows overlooking the ocean. On one wall is a weapon rack with a magical spear on it.

Fengarr hangs out for a bit and nothing interesting happens, and is about to leave – then she starts examining the journal. She picks it up then immediately pauses. “Sidellac, come back in here immediately.” She calls. Fengarr huddles in for the altercation.

Sidellac enters the room shortly, bowing. The woman stops him before he speaks. “Did you get this yourself” Sidellac looks down. “No. I used the money to hire some adventurers.”
She sighs. “That’s fine. Can you bring them here?”
“Yes Ma’am!” He leaves the room, bowing. Thinking quickly, Fengar jumps into his pocket and waits for him to go downstair, then shapeshifts into a cat and then runs as fast as he can back to the tickling cricket.

Once he’s there, he finds the rest of the party in the bar and explodes out of the fleshy goop that was a cat
Imagine a cat is like fur and flesh glued to a balloon, and it just starts expanding, but it can only go so far and then it explodes and underneath the fleshy goop is a man in druid clothes.

He quickly explains the situation “Okay, so Sidellac is coming back her bring us to his boss lady and she knows that we opened the book so, ball’s in your court”

Everyone looks at each other, and basically shrugs. “Sure, we’ll go with him”

A minute or so later Sidellac shows up, all charm and smarm, and makes his pitch. We all kind of just stare at him, as he offers us money. “It’s okay, we’ll go with you” Sidellac grins. “Good! Is there time for a drink? There’s time for a drink” he pushes past us, flips a coin to the bartender, gets a drink and then slams it. “You have a problem” Braith offers.
NOPE” rejoins Sidellac.

They get to the tower. Sidellac tries to weasel out of introducing us and Braith makes him.

The lady asks us what else we found in the room, and we look to Lily, thinking of Bale and explaining the fire elemental. She notices our gaze and cocks her head. “You!” she commands. “You look familiar. Come forward!”
“I don’t think I want to” Lily says
She eventually coaxes Lily forward, recognizing her. “You’re alive! We looked everywhere for you. Your father”
some stuff. Bale shows up, lady is super excited about it.

After a bit she gets really serious. “So what did you do with the artifact”
The party gets quiet, at a loss to explain it. “It’s kind of a long story” Braith starts
“Do tell”
“The goblin king stole it”
A flash of fury crosses her face. “You expect me to believe that a FAIRYTALE STOLE THE ARTIFACT
Karina steps in. “Yes. We’ve encountered him before in the undercity, he was impersonating a gnome in the mountains. He has some kind of problem with us.”
Lady Calanoth looks in her eyes, and sees the conviction in them. She sits back in her chair. “Do you have any idea where he went”

- We tell the story about David Bowie. Lady Calanoth is still pretty pissed -

“Meanwhile, you six have proven yourselves useful, I have another job for you.”
Raskogg leans forward. “Tell us more.”
“It involves pirates”
There was a shipment of research materials coming from Panleon (the land to the south of the sea) and it was abducted by pirates

We’ll know the cargo by this symbol:
carrot.png

300 now 300 when you recover our goods. Karina looks her in the eye, meaningfully. “If we undertake this task, we might need to be better equipped”
Lady Calanoth agrees.

Karina remembers the incubus amulet – “We found an item that needs to be destroyed”
“Oh is it cursed?”
“Yes.”
“Well I think we can take care of it. What is the item”
Karina looks at Raskogg, who reluctantly surrenders it. Raskogg pushes for a finders fee.
Lady Calanoth visibly blushes when she realizes what it is. “I will give you 2,000 gold for this”
“2500”
She pauses for a second. “That’s fair”
Karina stops her. “I can’t let you have this unless you will destroy it”
Lady Calanoth responds immediately “Oh I will most assuredly destroy it.” Karina nods.
Raskogg butts in again “so, 2500 gold?” and holds out a hand. Calanoth fills it with a bag of gold.

Then she gives us the 300 gold for hunting down the pirates and goods they stole, and a note that allows us to get whatever we need from the armorer, and a note that will allow us to use a ship for the purpose of hunting pirates.

We find Sidellac outside the door, and he takes us to the Armory. Braith offers him a job several times, he looks dismayed to get the offer while at work.

The party gets some things from the armory and then moves on. Braith goes and buys a magic battleaxe.

Sigrid buys some poisons.

It’s late evening.
The party goes to the dock and Raskogg intimidates a dockworker, asking about the missing shipment. He’s never seen the symbol before, and is really freaked out by the large dragonborn asking him questions.

Raskogg goes up to a random merchant man. “Have YOU been attacked?”
“uh, no?”
Lily holds up the symbol
""

“Pirates aren’t cool. They’re kinda dicks” – merchant person
“You probably shouldn’t say that she’s like 8” – Karina
“I KNOW WHAT DICKS ARE they’re mean people” – Lily

Lily has a long conversation with a sailor about his peg leg, in which Lily reveals that she’s always wanted a peg leg and admires the styling of his painted, walnut peg leg.

Raskogg gets a symbol from him

piratesymbol.png

Braith offers him a job “are you moving cargo?” he asks. “Well, we did give a woman an incubus”
“Is that a euphemism?”
“I don’t know I’m 9”

At the ship There’s a blue man who Lily immediately recognizes as like her- but a water elemental spirit.
She pukes over the side of the boat.
Bale and the Water elemental have a short conversation.

Lily holds up the symbol
“oh I see. You’re looking for the pirates. To join them or fight them?”
“We are going to murder them” Raskogg says, taking a chance.
“Then we are going to murder you”

FIGHT

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